Why?

I visited my dad this past weekend and was rather disturbed. He is a big guy, tall, big-boned, and can stand to lose quite a bit of weight. And I realize he has bad knees and arthritis from a lifetime of sports injuries. But he was barely able to walk after getting off the couch, was hobbling around like a 90 year old man (he is barely in his mid-fifties). He made a comment that he was sore from mowing the backyard that morning. And FTR, it is a postage stamp yard, half filled with a pool and a barn. So, I am a little worried about him. I even asked him if he was this bad now, where was he going to be in 10-15 years? I told him he needed to start exercising rather than sitting on the couch watching sports and golf all day. He wasn't real interested in that.

So after my 5.5 mile run the other day, the snarky person inside of me sent him this text "Hey old man, I ran 5.5 miles this morning!"

He didn't respond.

I talked to him on the phone the other night and he mentions the text and asked me why I punish myself like that. I responded that it wasn't punishment, that I enjoy it.

So why do I run? Pastor and I had this conversation during a short run yesterday. He was curious if I felt it was a healing process for me due to a difficult childhood. No, not really. It's crossed my mind, but it's not my focus. I don't think about that while running.

So why?

It started out because I wanted to lose weight and I hated it. After starting and stopping a couple times, I found the Couch to 5k program and finally stuck with it. After nearly 2 years, I haven't lost any weight, but I am sticking with it and I love it now.

I love that peacefulness I experience while running, just me and the road and God. I love that feeling of accomplishment when I am done. I love (and hate) pushing myself physically beyond what I think I am capable of. I love pushing myself mentally, that when my brain tells me I need to stop because my body is exhausted, I can tell it "maybe later". I love the energy burst I get after a run, it's better than coffee (though it will never replace it)! I love having it as a way to spend time with good friends and my husband and my daughter. I love how it's a stress reliever when I am upset. I love running.

Running has given me a healthier body. Even if I haven't lost weight, I am still healthier than I was 2 years ago. Running has given me confidence I didn't realize I had lost. Running has given me a sense of inner strength. Running has given me a way to break through obstacles in life.

Running is a gift I give myself every time I go out.